The ‘I’m struggling’ thread

jonthehammer · Jan 9, 2021

Same mate, hes very good. Check out a song by him called 'Oh Maria', brilliant tune

robith · Jan 9, 2021

Nice list. I'm a huge National fan boy - me mum got me the 10th anniversary vinyl of High Violet. Put it on loud and listen the fuck out of it.

Not well known but the song The House That Heaven Built by Japandroids is an instant depression cure.

Back in the mid 2000s I used to run an indie night in Central London. We did loads of NYE parties back in the day. Brought it back on twitch this year, said I'd do till 12:30 ended up going till 3am as there were loads of people on loving it. Amazing the power music has to overcome ill.

nortonscoin200 · Jan 9, 2021

Can't see anything by Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes on here - I'm shocked!!

Kevloaf · Jan 31, 2021

I am struggling, really struggling ....I feel so lonely, and the stupid thing is I know I'm not...I know I'm so lucky, so I feel even more of a fucking idiot.

I'm embarrassed. I am not even sure why I'm posting it, I assume I'm attention seeking.

Middle_Of_March · Jan 31, 2021

Hi Kev. Not sure if you’re online or not as I’ve only just seen this.

it’s ok to feel lonely. It’s ok to walk to talk about it and it absolutely is not attention seeking. No matter how lonely you think you feel, try to remember that you’ve got a whole army of friends on here - even if the majority of us haven’t actually met yet.

My DMs are open if you want to talk and are still awake?

The King Pimm · Jan 31, 2021

I was up around that time chasing a puppy around the garden trying to make it take a crap for the 4th time last night!! Unless you were trying to do the same thing and struggling like I was then you sound like you’d benefit from having some interaction or a chat with someone. I’ve just messaged you personally so feel welcome to get in touch when you feel ready. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, these are strange times and this time of year can get anyone down in the dumps even when we’re not locked up with very little to do. Get in touch buddy :encouragement:

astontom · Jan 31, 2021

Hi Kev, I'm relatively new here but just wanted to respond to this and echo what the others have said. It's definitely ok to be feeling lonely in these strange times and I'm sure all of us have felt that way at some stage during the pandemic. Reading the forum has really helped me so not only do you have a whole army of friends on here, your hard work is making a difference to more people than you probably realise. Like the others my inbox is open if you want to talk. Please don't think you are attention seeking, your post was both brave and absolutely the right thing to do. Remember there are loads of us on the forum here for you

Grinch · Jan 31, 2021

this is such a good idea for a thread...the mental health impact of this period will impact far longer than the numbers etc,,awful as they are ..no consolation but i fear greatly for the children who are being seperated at a time where socialisation is so important ... i will share my experience .. i am quite a way down the ASD road ..so spent alot of time in my head prior to all this ..generally scared of everything so at least now i have a reason to be .. i was like ..ha now u feel it mf s ... but there have been some good things ..i have spoken to people i havent spoken to in years ..people are more open to caring ..and we still have the sport to keep us in routine .. doubt this helps anyone but myself ..but alot of people care and if you look there have been so many simple acts of humanity its made me blush ..iain

Dandrew99 · Jan 31, 2021

You don't need to feel like an idiot, people can feel lonely in all sorts of situations. Just because you're lucky in some aspects doesn't mean you should feel bad feeling lonely.

As others have said, you have a load of people here who are always happy to chat, myself included. We can also have a few more games of chess if you'd like :encouragement:

Geordieboy83 · Jan 31, 2021

Kev you are certainly not being silly or stupid, and you are certainly not alone, there is so many people out there now struggling. I am know I’m not the only one to say my inbox is open if you want to talk. Your FJ family are here for you mate.

nortonscoin200 · Jan 31, 2021

Kev, we may only know each other through these pages but it would be an absolute pleasure to talk to you any time.
You have the love and respect of so many people on this forum who are indebted to you my friend.
To borrow from the anthem adopted by your Merseyside rivals: You will never walk alone.

RufusFlynn · Jan 31, 2021

I think this highlights exactly why this forum is such a great place and a lifeline for so many on here... we are now almost a year on from normality being disrupted and I’m sure everyone has had days/spells where they are struggling.

Even without actually posting - having this place to check in with everyday has been at least something to engage with and provide an escape.
Kevloaf thank you for speaking up, sure many on here see you as somewhat of a forum leader and you generally seem so upbeat and positive but anyone can be struggling under the surface. Loneliness is such a strange emotion and can be hard to deal with but no one should feel embarrassed about how they are feeling. To anyone else, this really is such a supportive community, and for what I presume is a predominantly male forum, the fact this thread exists is excellent. DM’s are always open for anyone who needs it...

Keep talking lads (and lasses) - we’re here for you.

Hope today is better Kev, and anyone else who isn’t feeling great today.

YoungHustler · Jan 31, 2021

Hi Kevin. You should not feel embarrassed and are not attention seeking. I thank you for having the courage to share with everyone as I know from experience that it is the most difficult thing to do. I have family, friends, money and yet I don't know why I feel completely empty at times and just uninterested with anything. I think it's just the not knowing why we feel like this which drives us mad but I've now learnt to cope although I still go through days when I'm feeling very low.
I think you live with your partner so I'm hoping you have also shared with her as someone you can actually talk to is very important. Telling my best mates was the hardest and I did it on a night out and I think half of them don't remember as they've never asked me how I am since!! But I've talked openly with my best mate and he checks up on me which is great of him. So please share with your nearest and dearest and of course you have all of us fat jockey's too.

somer1 · Jan 31, 2021

Heya Kev. It gets to us all in different ways sometimes. You have a very large Fat Jockey family here and anyone of us are here for others. TC buddy the fest will soon be here

Liammet · Jan 31, 2021

Admitting that you are struggling is the first step to recovery

Anybody that is not struggling after the past nine months is doing very well

The important thing is not to hide it,speak up,you will be amazed what a lift it will give you to share your feelings and to be reassured by friends and family that you are loved and not alone

please be assured that the wonderful work you have done on this forum has done so much for our mental health

Everybody is different and what helps someone might not help another

when I was struggling I was advised to walk everyday,you cannot imagine what it has done for me

It is great headspace and makes you feel healthier too

Hope you are feeling better soon mate

it’s ok not to be ok

Joleg · Jan 31, 2021

It takes a good man (which i know you are) for putting their feelings into words, so firstly, well done for that. Secondly, absolutely no need whatsoever for the embarrassment, you are not 'a fucking idiot'. Quite the opposite, as many have alluded to.
Please add my name to the long list of people that are more than willing to talk, my DM's are always open

Kautothegreat8 · Jan 31, 2021

I'm in the same boat Kev.

Life is certainly shit at the moment. I go to work and it's an absolute nightmare from 7.00 to 5.30 everyday. I find myself talking to myself just to get me to the end of the day. When I get home I just want to go back to work through pure boredom.

The final straw for me was Cheltenham being abandoned this week. Something I was really looking forward to taken away by nature again.

I think theres alot of people in the same boat. If the Idiot known as Boris could just open the golf courses I would have some sort of release.

Keep plugging on mate, I'll be doing the same.

Good times will come.

Deleted member 4957 · Jan 31, 2021

I say this to a number of my mates who are struggling.
Positive cases are bombing, hospital admissions also dropping, deaths will start to drop very shortly, I strongly believe we will be in a much much different place in 4 weeks time, I still haven't given up all hope of members being allowed into the festival.
By the time the festival is upon us some 25m-30m people will have been vaccinated, I accept schools are crucial and will always take priority but the numbers last year proved that the re-opening of pubs, restaurants etc in July did not lead to an increase in cases so there's little reason for there not to be a careful re-opening of the economy from early/mid March in line with schools opening.
So, whilst I appreciate I have often held misplaced optimism on all things covid, we really should see a change in the coming weeks so our lives can at least see a partial return to some sort of normality.
My advice therefore is chin up, strap in, stay positive, things will be better very soon....

Quevega · Jan 31, 2021

There is talk that some social distancing will remain in place for the year ahead though, as the early signs appear to suggest that the vaccines don't protect you from getting the virus and therefore passing it on. They just stop you dying or getting seriously ill.
Although like yourself, I'd like to think that with the more vulnerable protected the rest can take their own chances.

This means that it's up to people's own choices.

And for those that don't have the vaccine for whatever reason. Good luck to the ones in vulnerable groups.

And those in not so vulnerable groups, good luck also, and good luck with whatever else comes out regarding the long term impact of this virus.

The article I read yesterday about thousands of people with no sense of taste or smell months later, or even worse, a total rewiring of the brains sense of smell so that things like fish and chips smell like shit, or your wife's normal smell stinks of vomit or death.

Ain't nobody got time for that.

Saxon Warrior · Jan 31, 2021

Kevloaf
You are a tower of strength to us FJ members.

You did the right thing to post your feelings, that action is a strength in itself.

We are here for you.

If you want a catch up on the phone, just DM me and we can set up a time for a chat. :encouragement:

The ‘I’m struggling’ thread

Previous Lurker

Fat Jockey FPL winner 19/20, 20/21 and Patron (est

Fat Jockey Patron - One Horse - One Race Winner 20

Apparently came 3rd overall in the Fantasy Premier

Fat Jockey Patron

Fat Jockey Patron (est. Jan 2021)

Fat Jockey Patron (est. Jan 2021)

Previous Lurker

Fat Jockey Patron

Fat Jockey Patron (est. Jan 2021)

Fat Jockey Patron - One Horse - One Race Winner 20

Member

Member

Member

Fat Jockey Patron (est. Jan 2021)

Fat Jockey Patron

Previous Lurker

Deleted member 4957

Guest

FJPatron - DGCup Winner 2026

Member